No matter what you are your bottom line goal is to raise nice, well mannered , loving, kind, caring, human beings.
I grew up Catholic with very strict Catholic grandparents like many other Catholic children I know. My mom was not as strict, but was a great role model of what it meant to be Catholic, and accomplished giving me roots greater than I in the faith. Without her direction in faith I wouldn’t be where I am today with it.
When it was time for my confirmation I struggled greatly with it because I was so upset with God and how my Mother could not receive communion because of the sins of my biological father. (Long story that’s not mine to share but I’m thankful and grateful for all my mother did.) This really took my faith a step back for many years. The anger I had was directed at God and made my life not even close to the best it could have been.
Fast forwarding a good number of years I had gotten married to my high school sweetheart and we had finally been expecting after many years of trying. Sadly like so many, many, many people out there we lost our first baby to become an angel after getting pretty close to clearing the 1st trimester. The lost just utterly and completely crushed every fiber of my being. They had to do an emergency DNC and tossed our baby in the bio-hazard bin. It took me a long time before I wasn’t crippled by the agony of the loss. A few years later we had our son and then I was able to finally talk about it a bit with a few people. Then we had our first daughter, then second daughter, and now our second son. Within those 4 short years I turned from begin closed off and living like a shell of a person to reaching out to whomever would listen in hopes of helping at least one person and their agony.
This loss is what ultimately brought me back to my faith, God, the church, etc. Losing Robin made me realize I needed to be the very best person I could be so that one day I could be reunited with them. I know that most people would have ended up going the other direction and having a deeper anger or hatred for God, but I just never once had those feelings. It was almost like a weight was lifted the deeper I dove into my faith and the more I went to mass. I’m not saying I don’t still ache for our child because I do . Every. Single. Day. However, I’m comforted knowing our angel is up there safe from all harm and evil and sitting with my grandparents.
I say all this not for sympathy or anything like that I say this to give strength to any parent out there struggling. Children pick up on your emotions even if you think your hiding them. If your not in the mood for prayer or mass or such then your child won’t be either. The more you participate the more it becomes second nature and the more your child will want to engage and be apart of it.
Throughout the next chapters I’ll pass along tips and tricks that I’ve used to help my little ones along with their faith formation. If you have anything you’d like to share I would honestly LOVE to hear your ideas!
Extras:
If your worried about the pregnancy you could always ask your priest to bless your baby in utero. I wish I had thought of this with our Robin but didn’t. Once the priest blessed our children I felt so much relief and comfort knowing that at least if we weren’t meant to have them here on earth they’ve been blessed, even if it was an unconventional way.
Stay tuned for next Sunday’s chapter!
Till then Enjoy and God Bless
~Just your Average Mama